God’s Saving Grace

I Will Not Let My Light Dim!

2 Corinthians 12: 9

But He said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.

Hello Golden Divas!

I am so excited that God has brought us into another year where we can share our testimonies of His saving grace. You ladies know me I am advocating to let people know that “To Know God’s Glory; We Must Share our Backstory!”

My Golden Diva Interview to kick off the New Year is a compelling testimony from Loretta Rogers. This lovely Diva will be sharing “GOD’S SAVING GRACE” I employ you to take the time to read this interview in its entirety on healing, deliverance, hope, encouragement, lifeline, and redemption.

I had the pleasure of meeting Loretta through another Golden Diva by the name of Earnestine Davis years ago, and it is until recently I have been in her presence where we attend the same church at New Faith Baptist Church International.

This is where I have come in full contact with a Golden Diva woman who is virtuous as well as resilient. Loretta is a woman who refuses to let any occurrences that are hurled at her “Dim Her Light” because she knows …”NO MATTER WHAT…GOD IS BIGGER THAN YOUR CIRCUMSTANCES!”

“HALO IT’S ME!”

Hi, my name is LORETTA ROGERS, I go by LoRe’ I’m known as Loretta Rogers-Dykes White if you see my passport. I’m also known as Loretta Dykes and LoRe’ White. I embrace all parts of me it makes me my complete self, “Total You.”  I’ve been married twice, the first time I was married 22 years a total of 27 years together to my first love, Carliss Dykes. We have four children together, and I have a bonus son, Troy who is 44 years old from this union, our daughter Carlissa Monique Tenay was named after her Dad, Carliss. She’s affectionately known as Lisa, and she is 35 years old. Then we have three sons Philip Mykel (I loved Miami Vice, lol) his Dad wouldn’t let me add the Thomas to his name, he’s 33, Bryan Christopher 26 and the finale of the bunch Joshua Daniel 22. We have five beautiful grandchildren my daughter and her husband have three children, Roman 7, Chase 5, and Elle 3. My Son Philip and Eliza have two children Naomi 7 and Cateleya 1.

In 2005 I married my best friend, we were married for 12 years. We merged our families becoming a blended family of 6 children.

I am from a family of four children. I have two brothers and one sister. I am the oldest child and girl. I’m the oldest living granddaughter on my Dad’s side. I am 56 years old soon to be 57 on January 31st.  I’m a proud bona fide “Daddy’s Girl.” My Dad could not move without me; if you ask my siblings, they would say some things do not change.  We were members of St Bethel church throughout my childhood where I sang in the choir.

I am a 1979 graduate of Rich Central High School where my track photo is proudly displayed. I was very active in track. I ran the 220, 440, and mile relay. We went to state my Jr Year where I was the anchor in the mile relay. I was on the dance squad, volleyball, basketball, afro club, student council, and many other extra curriculum activities. I have always been a social butterfly. While in High School, I worked at Allstate Insurance Company for two years, this is where I met my first husband. Yes, He robbed the cradle and this was my first detour, love hit (I didn’t want to leave my love).

Upon graduation, I considered Jackson state and ended up at Robert Morris College where I became a Certified Legal Secretary landing my first job at Peoples Energy working for MidCon Corporation Legal Dept. as a Legal Executive Secretary and Paralegal. I worked there for many years ultimately commuting to Lombard, IL for a time. From there I went to several law firms Winston and Strawn Law Firm, then William, Leavitt, and Macy to name a few. I finally landed my first job in banking at First National Bank aka First Chicago, Bank One, and then J.P. Morgan Chase. I started out as an Executive Assistant, and later I worked in management and officer-level positions before leaving to relocate to Minnesota in 1993.

While working at the bank during the 80’s I meet my best friend Kim who led me back to Christ. Then I JOINED Homewood Full Gospel Church under Pastor Pedersen where I was a member of the Praise Team. I also returned to college at DePaul University…

Later in the early ’90s, I was led by the Holy Spirit to join Full Gospel Assembly where my gifts were stretched. I became one of the first of four Praise Dance Team Members as well as the Praise Team and the Women’s Ministry. We’re chosen to be a part of leadership, so we formed Covenant Partners Ministry, etc. Life is good my marriage is healing, boom now we must move to Minnesota.

Upon this move, I CHANGED CAREERS and transferred my skills into the computer training field at Productivity Point as a Training Specialist and later promoted to Facility Management for both facilities. My NEW CHURCH was Speak the Word Church International under the leadership of Pastor Randy Morrison.

Then in 1995, I had my fourth child, and at this time we decided I would become an “at home Mom.” I don’t use “stay at home,” those who know me well know there is no stay in my bones. This was when I took up selling Mary Kay products as a social outlet and a way to earn extra “fun funds” while being the Gate Keeper of my home. Additionally, with an infant, I also ENROLLED in evening studies, at Crown College to pursue my Ministerial Studies. Two years later, we relocated to WI.

Four children later, I must REGROUP again…after being home with the kids, I later take on a third shift banking role for a year.  Additionally, with a toddler, I returned to College at Cardinal Stritch University where I GRADUATED with honors with a BS. In Business Management and Human Resource Management May 1999. I also worked for my husband as he was a District Manager with Allstate. 

Now, I have a NEW CHURCH Christian Faith Fellowship under the Leadership of Bishop Darrell Hines and Pastor Pamela Hines. I joined the choir and Women’s fellowship. This became home for ten years, and it was imperative that we keep the money in the family. Ten years later, we MUST MOVE AGAIN to Dallas, this is after 911, so the housing market was awful, and it took a while to sell our Pulte Home when usually these houses will sell instantly. 

My oldest son is a junior in high school when summer goes by, now it’s a new school year, and he’s a senior. The house doesn’t sell until Thanksgiving, and we must move out the week before Christmas into temporary housing while Philip finishes up his senior year. All our belongings get shifted to Dallas, and at the time I had no idea my life is about to change again.

Philip graduates, and it’s apparent my MARRIAGE has ENDED… I lost so much, and I must START OVER AGAIN. I hit my lowest point.

Now, I’m confronted with choices, I and the boys move to a townhouse up the street from our home, so that I could keep life as normal as possible for the boys. My daughter is in college. I land a job in the financial area and must leave my babies for four days a week. I leave on Sunday evening to work Monday through Thursday… eventually we move back to Chicago so that I can get married.

The FAVOR OF GOD shows up mightily I get my job back with Chase after 12 years. I’m a Financial Banker, and life seems to be good. That’s when the mask is developed.

CURRENT SITUATION: In spite of it all… I found my “NEW CHURCH” New Faith Baptist Church International under the Leadership of Pastor Trunnell D. Felder and Rev Alexis L. Felder. I joined the Praise Team under Dewayne Wood, then Minister Kevon, and then I had to take a leave, I was in the hospital for two months. I had incredible support from family and church family to heal from my neck injury. I had just started Teacher’s Training and completed training while wearing my halo. Now, 2008 I am in Deacon Training while God is healing and restoring my body. I am also Co-Chair of DDR. 2012 I get ordained as a Deacon, and I am a member of Glorious Splendor Women’s Ministry and the Prayer Ministry.

Additionally, I reached my ultimate goal of Directorship. I became a DIRECTOR with Mary Kay with over 75+ team members and with over 200 clients.  I earned my first Mary Kay vehicle, and I opened up my first studio with my business partner.

I love people and giving back. I have been on many boards and community outreach efforts. I am warm-hearted, kind, generous, very friendly, I have a compassionate heart, and, I value family, and I have a robust value system. I am a warrior in the Prayer realm; I call myself “Sniper in the Spirit” I love to sing; however, unfortunately, I temporarily lost my ability to sing for four years after my injury. I have a strong sense of faith. I commit myself and give my all to my family and friends; sometimes it’s not right. I try to bring back a dead horse; however, when I am done I am done, and I know that I have given my all. I love to read, travel, and to try new things.

The best part of my life is a Mom and GlamMi and “MiMi.” I firmly believe in the institution of marriage. I think there is love for me… I have so much of it to give.

I choose to be transparent because I have nothing to hide. It is my hope and desire that my life gives hope and deliverance to others. My anointing is for women and children. I’m on several boards:

2014 South Suburban Cultural Enrichment Organization “SSCEO”

2015 Flossmoor Service League “FSL”

Empower 4 Change “E4C”

I will not let my light dim. Total You, My Best Self!

IN CONVERSATION WITH LORETTA ROGERS

C50: What are some challenges that you might have faced in the past that you know only God had gotten you through them?

LR: In 2006 I was diagnosed with an “UNEXPLAINED TRAUMA” to my cervical spine. To get to the point, bottom line I had a “broken neck.” How do you break your neck and not know it? Well, I did… I was not in a car accident. This was so hard to process. It would have been easier to handle if I could have had an explanation. Through much prayer and seeking God, I have learned that STRESS does indeed hurt the body and can kill you.

The journey leading up to this diagnosis was very frustrating. In 2002 through 2004, I was going through a long dragged out divorce after being married for over 20 years. It was a very stressful time and a big struggle to deal with my reality that the man, my husband that I have loved and gave my all to since I was 18 and the father of our four children was out of my life. It felt like someone pulled the rug from underneath me.

It felt like a semi-truck had hit me, and finally, there was a pit in my gut that I could not shake. I come from a legacy of a strong sense of family and lifelong marriages starting with my grandparents and beyond. I did not come from a broken family, and I indeed did not want that for my children. I had the best covenant model in my parents who have to date been married for 57 1/2 years, and I was not going to fail at my marriage, I refused to let the devil take anything from me, not me “Mrs. Perfect,” an accomplished woman, prayer warrior, and an overachiever.

Unfortunately, I was fighting alone to save this partnership, covenant love, and union. Well, it happened. This broke me to the core deep down in my soul I was devastated and distraught. I could not handle the effects it had on my children as well as the collateral damages. Additionally, I was experiencing some bizarre changes in my health and body it was way too much to handle coupled with being in another state, WI away from all my family, and my support system.

While, I was losing my ability to walk, to feel, and discern temperatures such as hot and cold I was struggling in so many ways to understand what was happening with my body. I was going back and forth to the doctors, and no one knew what was going on with me. The doctors thought it was all in my head; no answers were given at the time, and my symptoms started mimicking so many different things from B12 deficiency, muscle weakness, and iron deficiency. Eventually, the doctors thought it was MS along with so many other things.

Fasting forward my divorce was finalized December 22, 2004, and I was still experiencing unexplained symptoms in my body, my heart was deeply broken, and I wanted ALL of my pain to go away, and God was taking too long. So Mrs. Perfect must fix things herself, now nine months later I remarried on September 11, 2005, to my best friend. That’s a story for another time.

Now, I am remarried, and my symptoms are getting worst. I am working downtown Chicago in Banking again after being an “at home Mom” for many years. I was dealing with many, many changes and my body was uncooperative, I had to take a taxi to work every day because my legs felt like lead, very heavy, limiting my ability to walk. I couldn’t get from one side of the street to the other before the light would change. There were many times I almost got hit by taxi drivers and other vehicles. I became concerned again about my health, so I got very aggressive in my search for answers despite how I felt treated by the Doctors. I went to God in prayer and asked for understanding; I asked God for the “ROOT CAUSE” so I could call it by name, and finally that He would give the doctor wisdom into my matters.

I got my answer, November 5, 2006. I am at Christ hospital after 8 hours of surgery on my spine I wake up to paralysis neck down. “QUADRIPLEGIC!” I freaked out. I am on a ventilator with tubes EVERYWHERE. Can God hear me? Hello!!!! Help!!! Where is the rest of me??? This is going on in my head. I am unable to speak. Is this a nightmare? This can’t be. I’m rushed back into surgery for another 8 hours, now I wake up, and it feels like five semi-trucks have hit me. I felt like shattered glass. I can’t move anything on my left side, and I’m dealing with super senses on all levels and can’t handle the air it hurts badly.

What the heck???  I can’t walk or do anything… two weeks out; now it’s almost Thanksgiving, I feel worst. I am finally off the ventilator again my chest hurts, and it’s a struggle to breathe. What is s going on???

I have a blood clot in my lungs and pneumonia, and I have to have more surgeries. The cadaver bone didn’t fuse to my spine, now the bone from my hip is used, and an IVC Filter is placed in me and to operate again, I must be given enough antibiotics to kill a horse per doctors to treat pneumonia to go in my spine again.

Here we go again, 8 hours later I woke up to a “Halo” a new member of my body. Do I have four screws to my skull? My halo and I have a six-month arrangement, and I am fused from C2-C7 in my spine. After the halo, I must wear a cervical collar for over six months, then the soft collar, and I was wearing neck gear for almost two years. I am PRAYERFUL that I will walk again, although there is no use on my left side and I am unable to speak or eat. Can you believe it, I am on thick liquids including water and puree foods. I can see why some babies find baby food disgusting.

The journey begins after several years I’m walking and have regained some of my abilities.

Lesson learned: We must PAUSE, PRAY, PRAY, PRAY, and PRAY some more and PAUSE again to hear the voice of God again. Otherwise, when we have experienced any life-altering situations and circumstances, we will operate out of fear and make unwise choices.

Only God could have gotten me through. One of my favorite scriptures; Philippians 4:13 “I can do ALL THINGS through Christ who gives me strength.”

C50: Has there ever been a time that you’ve felt that your circumstances were more significant than your God?

LR: Honestly, when I operate from my flesh, I had moments when it felt like my desire to save my first marriage was far bigger than God and my neck injury, the paralysis and not being able to walk. Can God save my family and heal me? I know my faith and God’s word says so, but, now I’m faced with needing a right now miracle.

There were brief moments that it felt like my circumstances were bigger than God when my healing and restoration were taking much longer than I expected. The pain was more significant than I could imagine, just unbearable and mind shaking. I did not know a body or heart could hurt this bad… will I ever feel normal again???

Now, I’m marinating daily in Psalm 138:8

“The LORD will vindicate me; your love, LORD, endures forever– do not abandon the works of your hands.”

Lesson learned: God might not come when you expect, but He is always on time.

C50: Why is prayer and staying encouraged so important when you are going through a crisis?

LR: Prayer is the vehicle and a vital key to staying the course. I have a saying; I’m the strongest and the tallest when I’m on my knees. It gives daily hope to what may appear hopeless and dead.

PRAYER is an opportunity for intimacy with God. To really understand the heart of God, you need to pray. “In John 15:15, Jesus says He no longer calls us his servants but calls us His friends. Talking with God develops a deeper relationship with Him.”

Lesson learned: God is all-knowing and He knows what is ahead for us and that it is through prayer that we get through life’s issues.

C50: Do you feel that you need to have supernatural faith in today’s society?

LR: Absolutely, we are faced with so many vices that have an entryway to all aspects of our lives without leaving our home. It’s going to take “Super Faith” to stay the course.

Lesson learned: You must VISUALIZE God’s promises for your life in the natural. It’s already DONE in the supernatural. I saw myself walking, and able body before it manifested. I accepted nothing less. I am also reminded that I must do that across the board in all areas of my life. Stop settling God wants the best. I am the daughter of the King.

C50: How can you encourage another Golden Diva that might be going through some health issues?

LR: I can encourage another Golden Diva with my life, my sharing, and being authentic. I deal with chronic pain and many physical limitations from my injury daily.  What I have been able to discover is that I have a choice in the matter. I choose to make God bigger than my health challenges and issues. I hit the ground every morning with my declaration, God you are ALWAYS bigger than anything I face. I honestly know God’s grace is indeed sufficient.

C50: What motivates you every day to share your testimony with others?

LR: I am motivated to share my testimony because I have often felt alone and most people rely on my faith and strength to help them in their situation. I am always told by family and friends if anybody can do it, you can. Sometimes, I don’t want to I get tired too. However, I now know that it’s a part of my anointing and assignment to encourage and to motivate others. I am not alone because God says He would never leave me or forsake me. Additionally, I found it hard to forgive myself for bad life choices and feelings of failure and to fail God. The scripture below helped me to heal.

Isaiah 65:17. Behold, I will create new heavens and a new earth. The former things will not be remembered, nor will they come to mind.

So, if my life’s issues and struggles can motivate and encourage someone else, then I am your girl. I know how powerful it is when you feel like you are at your lowest and family, friends, or strangers reach out with that touch, that word, or act of kindness to keep you going, what I call “GROWING FORWARD!”

Lesson learned: We must forgive ourselves it’s a form of pride. God has forgiven us. As we learn to forgive, we become more like Jesus. Forgiveness is not condoning sin. Forgiveness is choosing not to respond to sin with sin. When we forgive, we set aside our desire for revenge and trust God to exact justice. We decided not to hold on to bitterness, but instead to love those who hurt us. And as we forgive, God takes the worst of humanity our selfishness, sin, and brokenness and uses it as an opportunity to display His heart for the world one of grace, mercy, and justice.

C50: Why is God’s saving grace important to you?

LR: God’s saving grace is important to me because that’s truly what keeps me. I am kept in my mind, soul, spirit, emotions, and financially.

Over the last 2+ years, I have been through the most challenging times. It was more challenging than my divorces and neck injury combined. My mind, spirit, finances, and stability were under significant attack. “BUT GOD!” He had KEPT me on all levels with “His Saving Grace.” God’s saving grace is important to me because that’s truly what keeps me. I am kept in my mind, soul, spirit, emotions, and financially.

C50: Talk about how God is bigger than any limitations that you may be facing?

LR: I have been DISPLACED on all levels… my business, housing, finances, and vehicle. I lost EVERYTHING. I took a leap of faith to get out of an unhealthy situation that required me to truly lean on God in every way.

I experienced hardship on a massive level. But God! Thank you for His FAVOR, GRACE, AND MERCY. I have the most amazing family and friends that have been there for me through this journey.

Lesson learned: My setbacks are preparing my stage to showcase God’s glory.

C50: What makes Loretta a strong Christian Golden Diva?

LR: I am a strong Christian Golden Diva because I have found that I have the ability to be:

• Determined, diligent, disciplined
• Intentional
• Victorious
• Anointed, authentic

I have been determined to get the victory in all situations, and it requires my diligence and discipline. Secondly, I must be intentional in my steps. Thirdly, Victory is always my result. Lastly, I know God has anointed me for the assignment and that I choose to be authentic.

Romans 12:3 says, “For I say, through the grace given unto me, to every man that is among you, not to think of himself more highly than he ought to think; but to think soberly, according to as God hath dealt with every man the measure of faith.”

I have always had the gift of faith when I look back at my life. God has given me an unbelievable measure of faith and grace to know no matter what comes to me that I can take the lemons and make lemonade. I have always viewed life as “a glass half full “opposed to “glass half empty.”

I have the ability to keep getting up each time that I have been knocked down. I have been knocked down literally in every area of my life.

Lesson Learned: To embrace me. I can only be me.

C50: Why do you feel that it is imperative to share your backstory with other women?

LR: I feel it’s imperative to share my backstory and to be transparent to share hope, healing, deliverance, and to encourage women.

Unfortunately, too many times my intense love for others, my kindness, and my desire to give my all have been mistaken for weakness. I choose to keep the peace, to show love in spite of, and to provide my best because that is what God requires.

I was bullied from grade school through high school by other girls, a couple of boys and refused to let it prevent me from shining.

I will not let my light dim.

I ran track and cross country throughout grammar school through high school, and when you are running the closer, you get to the finish line the farther it seems. That’s how life’s journey is when we are our closest to the finish line the farthest it seems. We must keep pushing because the finish is near.

I have been in relationships where I was abused, mistreated, rejected, and unloved by people I thought who would love me. Unfortunately, they chose not to, and it could have kept me in the dark place. I suffered in silence to save face, to not be judged.  It could have defined me. It did break me, and out of my brokenness, I found my strength, passion, my peace, purpose, and anointing.

I will not let my light dim.

I have had WOMEN hate me on many levels, from many places; Corporate America, from family, friends, and yes, in Church too. Sadly, most of them didn’t really know me. It took strength not to let me write them off. I still chose to show love to them anyway. I have an anointing for women, and I cannot afford to allow their mistreatment of me to hinder me from loving my sisters and to be used by God for deliverance and healing.

I will not let my light dim.

My neck injury has caused me to embrace my new normal. My triggers will not trigger me. My disability will not define me or restrict me. My chronic issues will not be bigger than God.

I will not let my light dim.

Lesson Learned: God can use all aspects of our lives to help

Bonus Question:

C50: What is Loretta’s current situation? 

LR: Well, being honest and transparent I just came through a 2+ Year journey of life after divorce AGAIN. I prayerfully sought God about a long-term choice that was birthed out of the glasses of pain, neediness, loss of self, and fear. It hit me, in my face, I was not in God’s perfect will for my life. It caused me to realize I wasn’t healthy and needed to be completely healed. I came out of an awful relationship, situation, and circumstances and never took the time to recover, and therefore, I made an unhealthy choice and lifestyle change on top of a broken mess.

I lost myself along the way; my SELF-ESTEEM was shot. I didn’t know how to love myself and felt like I was in bondage to people because I had to wear a MASK. I could not let anyone know I was a failure again. Therefore, I put on my acting shoes and Angela Bassett, and I made a go of it. I was so good that I fooled myself.

The mask I wore allowed me to hide my pain and shame. I kept the smile going to keep from frowning this was a talent I developed over 30 years now. God has given me a gift to smile it’s just me. Unfortunately, I lost my gift of a smile so long ago that I didn’t realize it. I didn’t think that I was deserving of real love and happiness. I let the thoughts of being a failure to allow me to embrace things that were not good for me as punishment. All lies are from the devil. I know better, yet I believed the lies that kept me in bondage.

Therefore, I perfected the role of MOTHER it got me out the bed and up every day, despite the other areas of my life that I suppressed. I put ALL my energy and efforts into being the best Mom and GlammMi at the expense of being the best me, which would have made me the best Mom too. Hindsight is truly 20/20!

Life is shifting again in the area of Mother. Now, I am an “EMPTY NESTER” and the one thing that kept me going has changed. Facing my reality is hard. How did I get here? I cannot muster up the strength anymore… Lord, help me! I am crying to get me out again. I forgot what that looks like. I am afraid, will I like me? Who is me? What does she look like? Lord, please show me, ME.

There was so much COLLATERAL DAMAGE, especially with my credit, IRS took half my income for nine months, I had to give up so much. But God! Please know, regardless of our bad choices and decisions, we serve an amazing God and all things still work together for good. I’m at a fantastic Church, and I have met some incredible people who I cannot imagine not being in my life, and all of my gifts and talents were recognized in the midst.

Now, it is 2015, and I’m on the journey of “Re” REFORM AND REDEMPTION, etc. God is giving me a “Re” word every day, sometimes multiples. During this time, I leaned into God to get my life back. I became unreasonable and unapologetic in this effort. It required finding a place to hear because too much noise didn’t allow me to understand God and get direction. So I asked God to provide me with housing. BOOM! May 2015 I get a phone call to move into a house to heal and do the work to rediscover me for 21 months. Honestly, this was true, a blessing from God, and then March 2017 comes, and my faith is stretched again. I moved four times thanks to family and friends to bridge the gap while I trust God for permanent housing. I can get a library card

Well, I am happy to report that I have taken the time to heal, rebuild, restore, regain, me. I call it “Total You,” my ministry and business has developed from the journey. Total You by LoRe’ my smile is made for good. I had to do the inside job I can really look in the mirror and like what I see. ME!

C50: There you have it, our first Golden Diva Interview for the year with Loretta Rogers a woman who is unapologetically saved by the grace of God and is living her life out loud through her testimony. “BUT GOD!”